So, my wife managed to crash the car again today. When the police showed up, she was all fired up, pacing beside the dented bumper. “That guy was totally reckless!” she exclaimed, pointing furiously. “He was on his phone can you believe it? And to make matters worse, he was just sitting there, casually sipping on a can of beer like nothing happened!”

I glanced over. Sure enough, the man sat slouched in his car, phone on his lap, calmly drinking a beer as if it were a sunny afternoon picnic. The officer, notebook in hand, took a slow, deep breath. He was clearly trying not to laugh. Finally, he looked my wife dead in the eye and said, “Ma’am… you hit a parked car.”

The silence that followed was deafening. My wife froze, her jaw dropping. I tried really tried not to chuckle. The officer added, struggling to keep a straight face, “And that gentleman you’re so upset about? That’s a cardboard cutout we use for training. He wasn’t on his phone. And he certainly wasn’t drinking.”

My wife blinked, turning beet red. I had to bite my tongue to keep from bursting out laughing as she muttered, “Well… maybe he looked reckless.” The officer finally allowed himself a small grin. “Don’t worry, ma’am. Happens more often than you think.” Let’s just say the ride home was very, very quiet.